Work It! Work It!

{November 25, 2011}   Happy Holidays

Yesterday and the day before kind of kicked my ass. Wednesday I was feeling pretty bummed all day and then the fucking bar down the street kept me up until 2am. Thursday I did not have time to work out before heading to see my Gramps at the nursing home since the whole up til 2 thing. Then I went to two other dinners. I didn’t eat anything at the second last dinner and took my desert from the first one home. 

So technically I am behind a day already this month. I have not decided if I am going to do two work outs one day (one would be an ab work out) or if I’m just going to chalk it up to the holiday.

My eating has been pretty bad as well. Not just the holiday but the day before, since I was feeling bummed out, I went to a diner. I wanted to get out of the house and just chill somewhere. It helped while I was there, but as soon as I left I was bummed again.

Today my Grandma made biscuits and gravy since my Uncle was leaving right after. They were tasty. Although after my work out today (Scuplt 30) I had my chocolate milk and for dinner I will make fish tacos. MMMMM. 

Tomorrow I am going to the St. Louis Art Museum with my niece. I probably won’t be able to have my snacks, at least not the first one, but for lunch I think we will get Subway to take with us.  Or maybe I will take us out to St. Louis Bread Company.  That would be tasty.


{November 22, 2011}   I am feeling a …

I am feeling a bit under the weather so it is a good thing today is my first day off this week. I plan on spending the day in bed (now that my class is over) reading and napping. I am also drinking Naked Drink’s Green Machine and tons of water. 

I feel pretty good today otherwise. My muscles have that good sore feeling.  

I started the day eating well, but after class I had to run a few unexpected errands (one of which to get the Naked drinks) and when I arrived home my Grandma had lunch made. I felt way too icky to make anything myself so I just ate what was there, but in moderation. 

Yesterday I made fish “tacos” twice. Once for lunch, once for dinner. I could eat that all the time. I do hope I feel well enough to make them again tonight. After I nap for awhile. Mmmmm. Oh there’s no tortilla so it’s not really a taco. I really don’t like whole wheat tortillas. 

I don’t know if I will eat my second snack yet or just sleep until dinner time.

{November 21, 2011}   More GMD

I went back to read the part about doing the diet exactly as it is supposed to be. This part isn’t really necessary, but the author recommends it for the first two weeks. It’s balanced enough to do it long term, but you don’t have to. 

I decided I do want to be very exact with it for the next month.  

I noticed two things right away. 1. I am not in the right group. I should be in group 2 for the work outs I’m doing and I was eating in group 1. That is a difference of about 400 calories. Or a difference of adding 1 bread serving, 2 very lean protein servings, 1 vegetable, and 1 fat per day.  That protein would help a lot for my recovery. 

Also, I noticed that she highly recommends chocolate milk after work outs and that helps people recover a lot faster. I’m going to try it. I will take my milk from breakfast and add it after the work outs. I hate sports drinks so this seems like a good alternative. Of course it will be skim milk. 

I’m kind of excited about drinking chocolate milk after my work outs. Talk about a treat.

When I first read this book I was not working out. I’ve gone back to read a few sections here and there, but I missed the group part I guess. 

I’m going to switch up my usual fish dinner too. I really love fish tacos. (After steak it’s my favorite thing to eat!)  Instead of making fish tacos every night, cuz I’m lazy and they are battered and fried, I’m going to find some salsa and some cabbage and some chipotle mayo and just put all that on my broiled fish, which is what I eat almost every night. I love shredded cabbage and chipotle mayo. mmmm.  The mayo will actually take the place of one of my dinner fats so I don’t need to worry about hurting the diet. 

I hope the extra calories and the added protein and chocolate milk after my work outs will help with the whole 45 EZ problem I’ve been having. I will not be adding those work outs back, but like I said before, they are not all gone from the next month and a half, just most of them.  Plus once I start the real schedule I am going to try to go back to the full 6 days a week routine. 


{November 20, 2011}   One Month Down

Today was Core 20/Stretch 10. I find this work out a little lame since I don’t use the resistance bands. I may substitute one of my other ab work outs. Probably not, but maybe. 

I have scratched out almost every 45 EZ work out from now until January. If it was scheduled for two in one week I kept one.

Scratching those out actually makes me excited to keep going.

Today is the last day of month 1.  I may weigh myself later, I may not. 

I am not sure what I want to do yet, as far as this month’s goals. Part of me wants to just do working out for 30 days straight again. However, I am planning on traveling around Christmas again. It will be easier to stick to a work out, but I don’t know.

I also want to just focus on no sugary drinks, but I don’t think that will be too difficult if I focus on eating the good mood diet, strictly, for 30 days.

I think that will make me feel the best and I will be more likely to work out because I will feel good. I did great on the first week. Also since I have a week or two until I start PMSing again, I should have a head start.

Plus I believe I lost 6 lbs the first week of working out, when I was doing both. I really need that incentive at this point.

Although, today I am buying myself flowers. I worked out more than 3/4ths the month. It wasn’t what I had hoped, but I wasn’t sitting on my ass either.

{November 19, 2011}   WTf

This is really starting to piss me off.

I did Fire 45 EZ today. My legs were like lead, again. This is exactly what happened last time. It feels like I’m over-training, I just keep getting worse, but I don’t understand how that is possible. I work out less than 1 hour a day, 6 days a week. I also took quite a few days off here recently. I should have felt really great and ready to go. Instead I skipped the second to last part to do the finale and I didn’t even get a minute into it before I stopped. Granted, part of that is mental. I could have finished the finale part, but I was so damn frustrated that my legs felt so weak. I didn’t really see the point.

I’m considering switching over to CX again.  But I didn’t really see any loss with that either.

I wish I knew what I was doing wrong or wtf the problem is.

Next week I will not do Fire 45 EZ. I will do Fire 30 and Fire 55 EZ. Hopefully it’s just that particular work out. By not doing the 45 EZ I will be taking 2 days off.

On a side note, Monday starts month 2 for me.  Not that month 1 was spectacular, but as long as I do tomorrows work out (which I will) then I will have done 22.5 of 28 work outs. That’s not too shabby. If my weight is correct (not that I’m really keeping track, just a random time or two) I will have lost 4 lbs so far. Not much for a month’s worth of work, but whatever.  At least I’m 4 lbs down and not 4 lbs up.

Maybe by the end of next month I will look back on this one and think, what the fuck was problem?

{November 19, 2011}   Back on the wagon

Yesterday I did not work out. I was so tired still. 

Today I did Tone 30. That work out kicks my ass. It also did not help that I had to uncover my vent since my Uncle will be using my room for the next week. It was cold in my room so I closed the window before I worked out. Big mistake. I had to take a break after almost every exercise. Between the heat and the jump in my heart rate from squats and lunges it was too much. 

When I have not worked out in a long time lunges are always the first to go. Well, maybe push ups too.  Doing lunges and arm exercises at the same time is a recipe for self-inflicted injury. I’m so uncoordinated.  Luckily I haven’t hurt myself yet, it just doesn’t make for a graceful work out.


{November 17, 2011}   Vacation

I did not do well while on the trip. First of all, I did awful before I even left. Wednesday i was too worn out to work out, Thursday I had to finish everything I didn’t get done on Wednesday plus go to class. It was a mess.

Luckily I finished everything in time. Unfortunately I was pretty exhausted. We also did not stop until midnight our time 1am our destination time. Since we had to be up before 9am destination time for breakfast I did not get a chance to work out or even brush my teeth. Straight to bed.

The next day we missed breakfast and slept so late that I barely had time to brush my teeth. Margaret also picked fast food for every meal while on the road. I was a bit disappointed and it was all bad. Well the McDonald’s breakfast was decent.

That night, there was no way I was going to work out in front of Joe’s Grandparents and I was still exhausted. Joe had been coughing all night Thursday night, waking me up every couple of hours.

Saturday however, Joe and I walked for over 3 hours. It felt so good to walk around in nice weather and in bright sunlight. Especially knowing it will be the last time for quite awhile.

Sunday I was again too tired by the time we made it to the hotel. It was a great drive, but everything was starting to really catch up. I slept pretty well though and Monday night, when Joe took a nap I did the Stretch 40. It was awesome. I saw a huge increase in my flexibility. My elbows were about 2 inches off the ground for the straddle stretch, my lunges were really deep.

Tuesday I had class and Joe, my brother and I went to a shooting range after. I didn’t realize said shooting range would be an hour away. By the time we got back home, guess what, I was wiped out.

Yesterday Joe left. I was planning on working out after I dropped him off at the train station, but we actually arrived an hour early. Also, the train is about 45 minutes away.

I should have worked out anyway, but I was barely keeping my eyes open.

I am still exhausted today. I thought having a big bed to just myself and the dogs would finally allow me to catch up a little, but it did not. At least not enough.

I tossed in turned too late to work out before class, but I am going to do Fire 30 when I get home. Well, in the evening because I have to shower before class and I don’t want to shower twice right away. Maybe I will take a hot, relaxing bath. Mmmm I need that.

Oh and on the frustrating front, Joe and I broke up October 12th, ish, they picked me up on November 10th. He had already lost 15 lbs and even more inches although his weight is now staying the same. He looks really good. I wanted to punch him in the face.

Although he did give me great motivation to stop drinking all sugary drinks. That’s what he did. Well, a couple days out of the week he replaced two meals with protein shakes. Probably cuz he can’t cook. And he doesn’t eat white carbs any more.

I’m not going all out, but I am done drinking soda/sugary drinks. At least for awhile. I want my belly to go away.

I think I have missed a total of 4 work outs. I’m okay with that. I’m not going to start the week over, I’m not going to beat myself up. (That number is counting 3 hours of walking as a work out and my extra day off that I had planned anyway.)

I’m just going to get back on schedule and go right back to eating on the good mood diet. I am going to be a bit more strict now that I’m back.

It’s so important that I get back in shape and really just do what is best for my body. I just need to keep working on getting through those days I want to cry.

Oh, and I have a “period” tracker on my phone. It works pretty well, but I upgraded yesterday so I can start tracking my moods. I will see if it’s just pms or if I may just need two days off a week instead of one.

{November 10, 2011}   Well It Happened

I missed my work out today.

My dog had the worst bloody diarrhea all day.

Then he almost killed another dog.

My day sucked. I’m going to finish packing the go to bed early.

Right now, I don’t even want to work out tomorrow or while on the trip. I know that’s stupid, but that’s how I feel. I have to take Tux to the vet tomorrow and probably not go to math class. I’m just feeling pretty low right now. Each day is worse than the last. Not low as in “poor me” just low as in, I want to lay on the couch and not move for an entire day.

{November 9, 2011}   Hmmm

After some lengthy though process I realized, grumpy attitude + emotional + abdominal bloating = PMS.

I hope that’s the case anyway.

Also, I decided to stay home today to eat perfectly. I woke up to my Grandma’s freshly baked banana bread.

I had a piece with my GMD breakfast instead of my normal piece of toast. I may have another piece for supper. I never eat enough bread at supper anyway.

{November 9, 2011}   WTF

Today was tone 30. I was literally on the verge of bawling after almost every exercise. I wanted to laid down on the floor and cry my eyes out.

I tried to do really well on my diet today. I even took a shake to my Grandma’s when I went to visit. Unfortunately about 20 minutes later I was still starving. Now I realize it was probably because I didn’t have my usual big glass of water with it.

I ended up eating left over meat loaf and cheesy potatoes.

I feel so fat today. I even told myself this morning, when I noticed that I had a neck roll as I was combing my hair, that that’s the reason I’m working out. Eventually it will go away, if I stop it will only get worse.

I feel like my stomach is getting even bigger.

I kept thinking, though out my work out, about how last time, when I was doing really well, even with my eating, I didn’t have the changes that other people have in their before, month 1, month 2, and after photos. I didn’t look any different. I lost 7.6 lbs in 6 weeks.

I know, it’s better than nothing, but I could lose more weight with just weight watchers and sitting on my ass.

I know, I was gaining muscle mass. Maybe.

By the last 10 minutes I was feeling better though. I started noticing a few things to like about my body. My calves look nice and lean when I do a certain exercise. During that same exercise my arms look lean and muscular. Kind of like I want them to look when I’m not doing any exercise at all.

When I was driving earlier today, my wrist looked like a thin person’s wrist.

Why is it that I don’t really start hating my body until I start trying to change it?

I was so mad at myself for gaining so much in the first place. If I could go back to October 2007 I would tell myself, under no circumstances should you move 2 hours away from your school!

I can’t change the past and I know I just have to keep going.

Tomorrow I was planning on going to paint with Lynn, but I’m staying home. I’m not letting myself fuck up my diet at all. I have to get over this shitty mood. I am leaving for Florida on Thursday and I don’t want being away from home and my bad attitude to combine and keep me from working out while I’m gone. I can already feel myself planning on skipping the work outs. That’s not acceptable. I have to stick to my work outs. I’m almost finished with the month. This is day 2 of week 3. I have a little over a week and a half to go.

Even my inspiration board was making me depressed.

Maybe this bad attitude is my fat’s version of “I’m melting, I’m melting. What a world! What a world!”

Yeah, that’s what it is.

et cetera