Work It! Work It!

I would probably start over if I did.

I noticed something very sad yesterday. You know how your body changes, but because you are always around your body (hard to avoid and all that) you are usually the last to notice? ūüė¶ All the biceps I built up with CX are GONE. ¬†I know I shouldn’t be surprised, it’s been months since I really worked out. I can’t believe it’s been that long, but it has.

I am still working on the idea of working out. The one that I had in the last post. I was thinking of working out with fun stuff, then when I felt like a harder work out doing TF until I was sick of it and going back to the fun stuff. Whatever it would take to keep me going. I realized though and this is my main hurdle with the TF work outs, that the most important part of the TF schedule is the HIIT work outs. Granted I could just use the HIIT work out month and on the next month I could do fun stuff, but I already mentioned that I don’t push myself very hard during fun work outs so I wouldn’t get as much benefit. ¬†My OCD tendencies (I have a few) say that I can’t do that. I must get all the benefits from the program. My logical tendencies (I have a few of those as well) say that it’s better to do something than nothing and I really just need to get off my ass.

So for now, especially since I’m moving very soon and will have my schedule all messed up again, I am going with the fun work outs. Although I should call them informal work outs.

I will most likely do the combination I said earlier, the HIIT work outs and then the month of “fun” work outs. ¬† But I’m sure I will change my mind a million times between then and now.


As for food:

This is my 4th day back on WW/GMD. The first 2 days went pretty well, although each day I did go a point or so over. ¬†I was planning on just letting myself have a week to settle in and use up my weekly points a little here and there instead of on a cheat day. Yesterday, however, I was sick again. I don’t get this. ¬†It’s pretty awful. ¬†It actually started the night before. I felt like I was about to have a panic attack for several hours. Just antsy and like something was sitting on my chest. I almost asked Joe for a Xanax, but I decided to wait it out. It was better later on and I went to bed. I woke up pretty grouchy/gloomy/unrested. ¬†I barely ate anything for breakfast, 2 hard-boiled eggs and an orange. ¬†Then the panic feelings started to come back. My only thought on what caused this was the abrupt change in chemicals going on in my brain from the GMD. ¬†I don’t know if you have any experience with certain medications, but ¬†sometimes the dose can be too high. ¬†I know a diet isn’t a medication, but this diet is using the body’s own chemistry/biology to replace the chemicals most people get from drugs. The chemicals I would get from drugs if they didn’t give me way worse side-effects. ¬† Any way. ¬†I decided to just get some Burger King for lunch. I didn’t feel like making anything, the heat caused the bananas we just bought to go bad (I tried to eat one before I went to BK,) and I really wanted some comfort food/to get out of the house. I realized walking over there that I was trying to¬†alleviate¬†the anxiety I was feeling and that I really had absolutely no idea how to deal with those emotions other than comfort food, even after more than a decade of therapy. I’ am much better with the major anxiety I used to have and I’m sure I learned somethings along the way, but I must have forgotten. ¬†I will need to work on that at some point very soon. (I also made sure that I was going to be with in my points range and I had planned on drinking a shakeology drink for a light dinner.)

After lunch I started feeling really ill. ¬†Actually, with in the first couple of bites of lunch. I don’t know if it was the greasy food or the anxiety, or since Joe was feeling ill too, maybe the hard-boiled eggs. ¬† I laid on the couch in his office* with the AC turned up all day. (I finally got on the Glee wagon and watched the last of season 2.) ¬†After work Joe went to a friend’s going away party and I stayed on the couch. He brought me home some cupcakes and giordanos pizza. ¬†Only the most delicious pizza ever made! I have no idea how many points a slice is and I didn’t care. I was starving, yet still queasy. I only managed one piece before I cried uncle.

The plan was actually to eat some more to day, preferably with an ice-cold pepsi. ¬†My first thought upon waking was, “Girl, you are at 200 lbs, you can not afford a few more days of junk food.) ¬†That’s when I knew the rest of that pizza was Joe’s. ¬†Although if I get sick again today (last week it lasted 3-4 days) I will probably be eating it because I won’t be up to making food.

Luckily I feel great right now. I am taking a break from cleaning out my books for donation and then I’m going to really start packing.


*Joe’s office is an amazing game room. He does no work of any kind in there. He just has a bad ass gaming computer and about 12 different chess and monopoly boards. There are bookshelves though, with actual books on them. Aside from the text books he’s never read them. ¬†His filing cabinet is filled with Wii/GameCube games and controllers. ¬†There are various swords, knives and a¬†scythe¬†on the wall. ¬† This room has caused us a bit of friction. Not because I hate it or think he shouldn’t have it, but because he is/was really jealous that I have a studio and an office (2 separate rooms because the rooms are very tiny) in our apartment. I actually work from home. ¬†These rooms serve a purpose, but he claims I am taking over the apartment and he just gets one tiny room all to himself. ¬†One tiny room for his games, weapons, and weights. ¬†I don’t know why I’m putting this on my work out blog, but I find it humorous. After I pointed out the ridiculousness of the situation he stopped harping on me, however, I know he can’t wait until I move out so he can have it all to himself.


{June 19, 2011}   Where has this year gone?

It seems like I just started CX. Unfortunately it’s over 6 months since then. I have nothing to show for the hard work I have done. Mainly because that hard work is mixed in with a bunch of bad habits.

I am back at 200 lbs. My niece and I were decently active, but we all ate horribly.

As of today I am on a mixture of Weight Watchers and the Good Mood Diet. I know, I keep changing what I’m doing, but that’s because I need to figure out something I can stick with. I can stick with WW, but because I am no longer on the medication I need (long story, the doctor is kind of a dick) I need something until I move and find a new Dr. Right now, finding a new doctor is too much stress for something so short term. (I move in 2 weeks.)

My plan with these two diets is this:

With the GMD you can eat what ever you want as long as you eat the foods that will put you in a good mood. This is not really a weight loss diet. It can be, but I need more structure when it comes to eating what I want. This diet is a lot of food so I am not usually hungry on it, but I have a sweet tooth and I do enjoy mixing up my drinks once in awhile. I also like eating out.

That’s where WW comes in. I can track my points with everything I eat. Then as long as I stay in my point range I can have splurges. Even though the GMD is a lot of food, it seems like it’s very low in points. I just had lunch and I am only on 13.5 pts. (I am probably going to skip the 2nd snack today because I woke up very late and I want to get back to a normal schedule and not eat right before bed.)

What I’ve eaten today: Breakfast: 1/4 c. (measured before cooking) oatmeal (made with water) with 1 tbsp flaxseed (ground) and 1 tbsp splenda. This is really plain, luckily I like it this way. The flax seed adds healthy fat and I can’t taste it in the oatmeal. (I also, sometimes “fry” my egg and put the flax seed on top and put it all on a piece of whole wheat bread)
1 hard boiled egg, 1 c. skim milk, 1 orange. This was 7 pts.

Snack 1: 2 egg whites and water. (I was supposed to have milk with this, but I meant to add it to my lunch. I forgot.) This was roughly 1/2 a point.

Lunch: Shakeology with Banana and 1 tbsp Peter Pan Peanut Butter. Joe won’t let me buy the organic stuff. He hates mixing it. I also hate putting it in the fridge, but at my Grandma’s house I have a jar of Bee’s Knees Peanut Butter. This was 6 pts.

My second snack will usually consist of cashews (I can’t remember the number off the top of my head,) dried cranberries or another fruit, and a can of V8. I hate V8. However, this is the snack that really helps my energy. I can also chug a can of V8 instead of eating more vegetables. It’s easy.

For dinner I will probably have tilapia, baked potato with sour cream and butter spray, purple cauliflower (wth?!), peas, and a piece of fruit or so. I’m not really sure yet.

That’s a lot of food right?

I have 32 pts for the day plus 49 extra points for the week.

I may be able to get away with eating all this food plus a light splurge (no-pudge fudge brownies) every day and not use my extra points.

As for exercise. I am on the fence. I really want to start Turbo Fire. The only reason I am on the fence is because I don’t want to keep doing the same mistakes over and over. I want to follow through on my work out goals and I think Turbo Fire may be too hard core for me. There is a warm up schedule of 8 weeks, but I think I would get bored with TF after 8 weeks of build up and then another 20 weeks of the program.

I would also add pilates and the push up challenge to the Turbo Fire.

My other option would be to slowly build up my exercise, doing fun things (zumba, swimming lessons, etc.) to build up my endurance.

Well you say, Elisha, it’s obvious. I say to you, NAY! Here’s why: I don’t push myself when I am “going easy.” I just sort of mosey along. I don’t see results and then I quit.

So what to do?! An idea just popped into my head, but this post is already long enough.

I am doing Crunch’s Candle Light Yoga tonight before bed.

et cetera